BIRTHDAY RANT AHEAD! WARNING!

She has to renew her Georgia driver's license as it expires TODAY. This is what she now needs to take with her to prove who she is:

1. Passport or birth certificate (certified!!)

2. Marriage certificate since her name is not the same as the one on her birth certificate

3. 2 proofs of address

4. 1 proof of social security number

She does not have her birth certificate and has sent away for that two weeks ago. She doesn't know how fast the Okies will get that back to her. She doesn't know where her marriage certificate is and JUST found out about that one today. It can be a photocopy but can't copy what you can't find.

She have lived here for 26 years. She has paid taxes here for 26 years. She has birthed two children here. She has received and paid traffic tickets here. If the State of Georgia doesn't know who she is by now then they're just too stupid.

THIS.IS.RIDICULOUS.

She's taking up a collection for the ticket she most definitely will get for driving with an expired license. She's gotta go to work for crying out loud. And, who knows, maybe they throw you in jail for it now.

Just damn, Georgia. Get.it.together.

A Break Up Letter to the Flu

Dear Flu,

The PYB is breaking up. It’s not her; it’s you.

Yes, at one time she was feverish over you and would strip down to nothingness just to cool off. But, you are a fickle one and would instantly chill her to the point of making her teeth chatter. There wasn't enough flannel in the house to make it stop. She wants no more of this!

Her body ached for you like none other. It wasn’t a longing type of ache but a reaching-into-her-bones-and-stirring-the-marrow kind of ache; one that hit her to the core of her being and bruised her from the inside out. She wants no more of this!

You tired her, so. The utter exhaustion you rained upon her wore thin.    And because of the pain you caused it has been hard for her to rest; she couldn't get it off her mind. She wants no more of this!

But, still, you didn't stop. You messed with her head: the headaches, the dizziness, the confusion. Tylenol would give her temporary relief, but she needs a healthy liver so Flu, you must go. She wants no more of this!

She has a new influence in her life now.

You see, the PYB has met Tami. Tami treats her well and soothes her pain and suffering. Tami may be expensive, but has proven to be worth every dollar. It was a rough night, but Tami got her through and is making you, you disgusting Flu, a slowly fading memory. Each day, she is certain, will get better from here on out and she has Tami to thank for that. 

Go on, now. Be gone. You are no longer wanted here...not that you ever were. If you even THINK about coming back, think again. Tami is introducing the PYB to the SHOT; known to be a bit of a prick, but loyal. She has quit you, Flu.